A couple of weeks ago, Linda Mitchell hosted the Roundup (here) and generously offered up some “poetry clunkers” for others to use. I was intrigued by the line “What if this poem didn’t care?”
What if this poem didn’t care?
What if this poem didn’t care?
If it simply gathered up
its syllables and vowels,
packed up its consonants
and hit the road
not even looking back once
to see me, bereft,
fading in the distance
a pen, broken, in my hand
Molly Hogan ©2019
Jone McCulloch is hosting this week’s Roundup at her blog, Deowriter. She’s sharing a fabulous poetry swap she received from Tabatha Yeatts along with some of her swap-inspired poems.
Nix the comfort zone 
I can see this poem dressed up as Tom Joad heading to Californai in John Steinbeck’s Grapes of Wrath. Well played poem! Wasn’t JS quite the story teller!
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Ok…is this when I admit that I’ve never read “Grapes of Wrath” (hangs her head in shame)?
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I’m glad this poem didn’t pack its bags. Love it!
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Thanks, Margaret.
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Just Wow! This poem is a stunning use of that clunker. I’m more than impressed. I’m still carrying my clunker with me. I’ve played with it, but so far, I’m still waiting for it to all come together.
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Linda offered up such a lovely collection of clunkers. I can’t wait to see what you do with yours. I’m sure it will all come together, given time.
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I love this clunker’s new life…it’s so interesting and so sassy!
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Thanks again for the generous use of it!
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I am stunned to see the first commenter’s reference to Steinbeck because I thought of it, too, only Steinbeck’s Travels With Charley. The poem would hitch a ride! Molly, sorry it left you. But, the one that stayed is terrific!
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Eeek! Clearly I need to read some Steinbeck! lol
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the poem watching the writer with the broken pen is such a fabulous image, Molly! As I often say eventually with my own daily tragedies… at least you got a poem out of it. 🙂 xo
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There’s definitely some solace to those “daily tragedies”!
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Linda’s clunker shines in your poem. I’m glad your pen wasn’t broken when you wrote this one. It is such a memorable poem. I can picture that forlorn writer standing alone with a broken pen as the poem rides off into the sunset.
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I love Linda’s idea of sharing clunkers! I might just go back and grab another one 🙂
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I’m glad the poem cared! Nice job! Ruth, thereisnosuchthingasagodforsakentown.blogspot.com
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Thanks, Ruth!
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Well done, Molly. I love that you interjected what-ifs. At least, your poem did not hit the road and leave you high and dry. Your clunker line shines.
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You know I love this personification of the poem wielding its power to emancipate itself from you. Hm–what if every poem leaves us this way, thought perhaps without so much attitude?
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Your thought reminds me of the quote Linda shared from “The Way the Light Bends”, by Cordelia Jensen: “How much am I capturing something with my art as much as I am releasing it?”
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You picked a great clunker! Funny that they thought of Steinbeck…I thought of Ray Charles’ Hit the Road Jack, although in that case the poem would be thrown out! (I had to throw out a poem yesterday. Was kind of sorry to see it go, but what can you do? Some of them need a good kick in the behind.)
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You have me wondering what the “sell-by” date is on a poem. I have a few I’ve been fiddling with for years, but they just won’t quite gel. Perhaps I should just give them the boot?
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This one was a Golden Shovel whose body topic didn’t match the topic that the end words spelled out. It was pretty clear that I needed a do-over. If you keep coming back to those, maybe they still have potential.
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At least the poem cared enough to stop by! What if the poem walked right on past your door? Hmm…Now I’m picturing all of the unwritten poems out there wandering around. They seem as confident and self-assured as this one, but really, they want to be written and shared…
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Cast your net wide!
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Bravo, Molly! I just love this poem, especially the image of poet, “bereft…a pen, broken, in my hand.” We’ve all been there!
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Yes, indeed! Sometimes more than I’d like to remember! Happy writing!
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I’m loving all the conversation and thoughts your clunker poem has inspired Molly! It’s a terrific poem, and I could just feel the let down as the poem closes and you and perhaps the broken pen are both so distraught…
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Thanks, Michelle! Linda’s clunker was a welcome inspiration!
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So glad I saved this to come back to. I care about this little poem with its bad attitude. In fact, if you don’t mind, I might introduce it to some of my students this year.
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I’d be delighted if you shared this poem, Amanda. Thanks!
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Love this concept. A poem with an attitude.
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It all started with that clunker! Isn’t it wonderful how we can spark ideas for each other?
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Hi Molly, catching up on some older posts I opened, but never got back to. I absolutely LOVE what you did with Linda’s line! It reminds me of this poem that I wrote (and you liked) back in 2016: https://michellehbarnes.blogspot.com/2016/09/dmc-no-words-of-my-own-poetry-friday.html Clearly we both have an infatuation with words that pack up and hit the road! 😉
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Thanks! What a delight to revisit your fabulous poem and enjoy it again! I still love it! I’m also happy to be reminded about septercets and may play around with that form for a while. Thanks for that, as well!
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