Kurt, my husband, loves music and is appalled by my pervasive inability to name songs and artists. So, he likes to torture me, or at least remind me of my weakness.
“I’ll give you $20 if you can tell me who sings this song,” he’ll say. (Well, that’s what he used to say. Recently (maybe it’s the economy?), he’s been omitting the cash offer.)
As I’ve told him many, many times, I do not enjoy this game of his. It makes me feel frustrated and incompetent.
So, imagine my delight when my school started a sort of “Name that Tune” Fridays this year. They play a snippet of a song over the PA system before announcements. The winner is the first one to e-mail the Assistant Principal with the title of the song and name of the artist. Every Friday, as I fight to hide my negative feelings about this whole weekly triggering experience, my students clamor for me to get ready. I’m pretty sure they are as disillusioned in my abilities by now as Kurt is, but they’re much more optimistic. (Delusional? Nicer?)
“Are you ready, Mrs. Hogan!?”
“You might get it this time!”
I would say that 80% of the time I’ve never heard the song, or at least don’t remember doing so. The remaining times I might recognize it, but I don’t know either the title or artist or both. Recently, the office has begun sharing the winner’s name and the song and title in a follow up e-mail. As you might guess, my name has yet to appear. But, then, there was one recent Friday…
The warning came for teachers to get ready. I sighed and headed over to my computer, pasting a fake enthusiastic smile on my face. Music soon filled the room. The kids immediately abandoned their morning work and got up to dance.
“Oh! Wait! I know this one!” I said, cocking my head and thinking hard.
My students started jumped up and down in excitement, calling out encouragement and some random guesses.
Quickly, I typed in the song name, then hesitated…Ugh! Who sings this!? Who sings this!?…Inspiration struck and I tapped at the keyboard and sent:
“Roar, Katy Perry “
Yes! I did it!
The kids and I celebrated my potential win with a few dance moves, pondering aloud what the prize might be. All of us were a bit dazzled by the fact that I actually knew the song! Then we (sort of) settled back into the morning routines and got on with our day.
I left work early that day to head to Boston, and forgot to check my e-mail. On the way south I couldn’t help but wonder, Was I the first to respond? Did I win this time? I felt pretty good about my chances, but since I don’t have my work e-mail on my phone, I couldn’t check.
Sunday night as I prepped for the coming week, I opened up my work computer. There was the e-mail from the office! Feeling excited, I clicked to open it:
“Friday’s song: Sara Bareilles, Brave”
Wait! What?
I read it again. And again. Then it sunk in, and I just laughed and laughed and laughed.
As you might have guessed by now, my name still has not appeared on the Winner’s List.
Nix the comfort zone 
I am you! I NEVER know the names of songs, never mind the artist and I have so many musically inclined friends…
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I’m glad to know that I’m not alone in this shortcoming! lol
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First, congratulations on the near win. I’m not good at the music of this era, and often I recognize the tune but not the title. You and I share a common trigger here, friend. My father was famous for his random trivia outbursts. In his need to be the center of attention, he’d often call out someone’s name (like mine, and all eyes would be on him and me) and then ask some obscure question that only a smart person – or a person who’d just looked it up – would know. I never did. So I know from your word “triggering” in your blog that you feel the same way about “trivia” that I do. Ironically, I like Jeopardy. Those people choose to be there.
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We had a relative like that & my observation over the person’s lifetime was that this person was insecure in their own skin & liked to see others squirm as a way of feeling a glow inside …. Exactly as. you say. When you sign up for a televised or npr-aired radio show quiz, that’s your stepping up for this, which likely will be fun for you. The person with the question-quiz trap we all know at some time in our life is perhaps like those cunning Trapdoor Spider, needing for a victim.
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That feels like a “deer in the headlights” moment for sure! Thankfully, my husband usually only does this when we’re alone together. I can only imagine how uncomfortable I’d be with a larger audience! Ugh! I feel your pain!
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Interestingly, I’m sitting in the same boat as you and Kim. There are very few songs of which I can name the title and artist, so Singo Bingo is not on my list of fun games. I enjoyed your story and how the thrill of winning traveled with you. 🙂
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It’s been nice to know that a lot of other people are in the same boat!
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Lovely small moment. I like how you set the stage, allowing the reader know that this is NOT your favorite activity at school. How could it be when it reminds you so much of your husband. Then the shift to the day. I could feel the excitement of your students. Then the funny ending. As the reader, I was SO sure you were going to win!! If it were me, I’d suggest to the AP to gather songs from many time periods. I’m better with 1980 songs!
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Well, it took me until very recently to realize that the song selections are tied into our SEL curriculum. Now that I’ve had that epiphany, I’m going to hope that that insight will give me an edge on my next guess!
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I love how invested your kids are, even if this isn’t your favorite activity. You’re teaching them perserverance LOL! And to be fair, the two songs are pretty similar.
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I really try not to show how much I hate this. They are definitely well aware that I keep failing but keep trying again! lol
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If you ever need someone who’s WORSE than you are at Name That Tune, I’m your gal! (Same thing with actors and movies!)
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I’ll keep you in mind! lol
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I luv your classroom, Molly, as I’ve come to know it. I don’tt cheer like this contest [or the tired old betting] because song, like poetry can be an exciting starting point, not a race like a game show or an ending moment to feel defeat. How much more creative if the omnipotent faceless LS blares the tune snippet & asks everyone, staff & students -to spend the weekend remembering it & share alternative lyric lines, words or riffs that it inspires with their pen or pencil or digitally… Where is imagination these days.
I hope BOS was full or art or other fun for you & not med. appts. But, having lived in walkable distance to my appts. at Dana-Farber for 6 months in 2021, even med. appts. can be inspiring there…. Hugs from another would-be Friday loser, ‘twould I have been onstaff wit ‘ya 🙂
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My trip to Boston was family-based and quite fun! We’re enjoying being in travel distance from one of my nieces, especially when my sister and husband come up to visit her.. I like your idea that I could try to spin a different activity off of the songs. You’ve always got a creative riff up your sleeve!
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You did a great job writing the story, though!
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Thanks! I have had a tough time getting myself to write slices lately, but this was a fun one to dig into.
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Winning the song fest may have eluded you, but your story writing is TOP notch! This is a great story.
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Thanks! I still chuckle when I think about reading that e-mail—my hopes dashed cruelly, but my funny bone tickled!
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But you got a great slice out of it! How boring would it be if you just knew all of the songs?
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Well, that’s a good point! That would be boring. So, really, by not knowing, I’m just making my life more interesting! Thanks for that lens. 🙂
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I love how much your student cheer you one and never give up hope that you will win! (And what a wild school wide contest–do your students ever know the name of the songs?) Give yourself credit–you came up with a one word title and a female artist. That’s close!
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The kids yell out all sorts of things–mostly they know if it was in a movie, which is less than helpful to me. I’m pretty sure that teachers of older grades have an unfair advantage! lol
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I had to read this aloud to Jeff. It’s so funny! And the way you build us up with your banter adds to the suspense. I laughed out loud! I have both songs on my “I Have a Voice” playlist.
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That you read this aloud to Jeff is such a wonderful compliment! I love writing things that make people laugh.
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I actually chuckled as I read this – not only because I am also terrible at identifying songs (and artists – not a chance) but because I completely recognize and love the way your students cheer and support you without even realizing that you hate this moment. Perfect, really. Also Brave… Roar… practically the same thing…
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I’ve been surprised and heartened by how many other people can’t ID songs and artists! I’m glad you got a chuckle out of this, as I enjoyed writing it, and remembering it makes me smile. I just realized that the songs are tied in to our SEL curriculum (this particular month was Courage). We’ve switched to “Creativity” as our focus right now. I have no idea how that will help me with the next song ID, but I’m tentatively optimistic. lol
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